Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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