guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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