She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
