5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
