do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
