quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
