they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
this must be what syphilis tastes like
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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