Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
