Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
