I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
