is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
