Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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