Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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