Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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