i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
