roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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