i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
whose ass print is on the piano?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
