Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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