i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
farters have to be the big spoon...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
