whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
