Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Your shirt... Was in my pants
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
