You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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