We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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