Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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