Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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