O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
