Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
