I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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