I hate your face
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
