weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
