I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
