Plan B is the new Plan A
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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