If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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