Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
