i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
