Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
