I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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