i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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