party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Randomize
