Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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