wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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