I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
