And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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