Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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