just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
