No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize