So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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