I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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