so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
