I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
The feeling are messing with the penis
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
