morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It's blow job season.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize
