when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
